Winter Wonderland
by jammajjah
Summary: Kutner/Thirteen. Christmas story, post season four.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer- I don't own House, or the song Winter Wonderland

Sleigh bells ring, are you listening,  
In the lane, snow is glistening  
A beautiful sight,  
We're happy tonight.  
Walking in a winter wonderland.

Another Christmas, it was a year since House had officially hired her. So much had changed. Yet at the same time so much was the same. Kutner still thought he could make everyone happy by bringing them Christmas. His decorations lay in the trash barrel same as last year. Christmas carols could still be heard in the hospital, and it was snowing outside. The kind of snow that made you wish you were a kid again so you could go out and play. Thirteen wanted to build a snowman; she wanted to go sledding again like she did when she was a kid.

Thirteen felt someone tap her and looked up. Kutner was standing there smiling at her. "We have no cases so House gave us the day off, do you wanna grab some lunch?"

"Sure," She replied, so Thirteen and Kutner left the hospital together that snowy day.

Gone away is the bluebird,  
Here to stay is a new bird  
He sings a love song, as we go along,  
Walking in a winter wonderland.

A lot had changed Thirteen reasoned as she sat shotgun in Kutner's car. She and Kutner were together, she supposed. They weren't anything serious, they had no plans for a future. They were just having fun. As they ran through the snow to the dinner Thirteen smiled, she felt like a kid again; happy and carefree. When she was with Kutner it almost seemed like it didn't matter that she was dying, all that mattered was living for the day and having fun.

"Don't you ever feel like going outside and building a snowman, like when you were a kid, doesn't the snow just make you feel like you're a kid again," Thirteen blurted out very quickly, feeling embarrassed she was telling Kutner about this.

"It never really snowed in the part of India I grew up in, so not really a lot of snowman action," he replied. He had a smile on his face. It was a very particular smile; Kutner always seemed to have on his face when he was around Thirteen, especially if she had said something stupid. "What do you say after lunch we go to the park and build ourselves a snowman?"

In the meadow we can build a snowman,  
Then pretend that he is Parson Brown  
He'll say: Are you married?  
We'll say: No man,  
But you can do the job when you're in town.

Out in the biting cold Thirteen remembered why she didn't build snowman all the time. She didn't have any gloves so her fingers were wet and cold, they had turned bright red, they were so numb she could really move them. She couldn't feel her toes either for that matter. She was shivering outside with Kutner in the middle of a snowstorm, with three mounds of snow that had no hope of ever resembling a person. All her thoughts of reconnecting with her childhood were gone, and she was beginning to feel miserable. She watched Kutner stack the mounds of snow on top of each other. Then he stood there and rifled through his pockets. Pulling out some change Kutner attempted to give the snowman a face. Then they stepped back and looked at their work. The snowman had nickels for eyes and a mouth made out of pennies. Laughing as she looked at the snowman Thirteen realized she was falling in love with Kutner. The idea that she might be in love with Kutner scared the hell out of Thirteen. She hadn't told Kutner that she was dying. She didn't want to get attached to him; and didn't want him to get attached to her.

Later on, we'll conspire,  
As we dream by the fire  
To face unafraid,  
The plans that we've made,  
Walking in a winter wonderland.

That night Thirteen and Kutner sat by the fireplace in Kutner's apartment. Clutching Kutner's sheets around her Thirteen stared into the dancing flames. She cuddled up against Kutner and decided that she had to tell him. He needed to know that she was dying, it wasn't fair to him especially with the feelings Thirteen was feeling for him. As she opened her mouth to tell him, he cut her off, "Thirteen, there's something that I need to tell you. I know you said you didn't want to get emotionally involved, but I'm crazy about you. I'm falling for you, I think I love you Thirteen."

Thirteen was shocked, "But… But you don't even know me really, you don't know my name, you don't know anything." Despite the fact that Thirteen was feeling the same thing, she was scared to hear Kutner say it aloud, scared that he didn't know the truth about her, scared that when he found out he would reject her.

"It doesn't matter, I want to know more about you, and I want to be with you forever. I want more than what we have now, we shouldn't just limit ourselves to the physical, we have feelings for each other, we have love," Kutner said. Then he kissed her. Losing herself in the kiss Thirteen allowed herself to believe, just for that night that she could have a future, a future with Kutner.

In the meadow we can build a snowman,  
And pretend that he's a circus clown  
We'll have lots of fun with mister snowman,  
Until the other kids knock him down.

Two weeks later they were building another snowman. It was the same park, the same biting cold, but everything seemed different. She was feeling good, she had her gloves today, so her fingers had feeling. Thirteen was happy, she was in love, but she was nervous too. Looking at the grinning snowman, this time his smile was made of skittles, Thirteen told herself that today she would tell Kutner. She would tell him she had Huntington's, that all the plans he had been making for then for the last two weeks were pointless because she was dying. She looked into his eyes and saw that he looked so happy, so carefree. Not for long she thought to herself. I'm going to break his heart today.

"Kutner there's something I need to talk to you about," Thirteen said.

"What's up?"

"Can we go inside to do this?" Thirteen asked, for some reason she couldn't bring herself to break the news in front of the jolly, grinning snowman.

When it snows, ain't it thrilling,  
Though your nose gets a chilling  
We'll frolic and play, the Eskimo way,  
Walking in a winter wonderland.

The second they got into Kuther's apartment Thirteen blurted it out, "I'm dying Kutner, I have Huntington's." She stared at her feel not wanting to see his face, see the pain she caused him.

"But you… I thought you… why didn't you tell me before," Kutner stuttered.

"I'm sorry," Thirteen mumbled as she tried to make her way to the door. Kutner grabbed her and held her. As she looked into his eyes Thirteen saw sadness and pain, but she saw something else to. She saw love.

"This doesn't change anything Thirteen, I still love you, I still want a future with you," Kutner said.

"It's not that simple," Said Thirteen, but Kutner wasn't listening he was kissing her, passionately kissing her as if it didn't matter that she was dying. Thirteen decided that just once more she would let herself get lost in the winter wonderland.


	2. Let It Snow

Disclaimer- I don't own House or Let It Snow

A/N- I decided to make this a series. Basically it is going to be different Christmases with Kutner and Thirteen. This one is directly after the last one so in what would be season 6. Thanks to everyone who reviewed.

_Oh, the weather outside is frightful,_

_But the fire is so delightful,_

_And since we've no place to go,_

_Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow._

Thirteen heard knocking on the door. She ran to go get it. She opened the door and saw Kutner standing outside. Snow swirled around him, and into the house. "What are you doing here?" Thirteen said, "I thought were leaving for your Aunt's this morning."

"I was," He replied, "But the flight got delayed. Snow." He gestured around him at the glittering snow that was rapidly falling from the sky. "So I thought I could spend one more day with you"

"Come in," Said Thirteen. "Try not to get snow all over the place, I just mopped and vacuumed."

"You mopped, you must really want to impress your father," Kutner joked.

"Maybe, I just don't see him much, you know if you want you could stick around for another few days, meet my family..." Thirteen trailed off, she didn't know what she was doing inviting Kutner to meet her family, she never took the first step in relationships.

Kutner smiled, "You know I'd really love to, but I think my Aunt would kill me if I missed Christmas again. Maybe next year."

_It doesn't show signs of stopping,_

_And I brought some corn for popping;_

_The lights are turned way down low,_

_Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow._

Kutner settled down on the couch. "I brought popcorn." He said, dangling the bag in front of Thirteen. "I thought we could watch some TV together, maybe cuddle a little."

Thirteen put the popcorn in the microwave and turned on the TV. Frosty the Snowman was on. Thirteen watched as Santa opened the door and wind came rushing into the greenhouse and miraculously Frosty came back to life. She hated kids Christmas movies that were full of hope. She knew there was no point in hoping, people didn't really come back to life.

Kutner could tell Thirteen was not very happy with the movie, "Don't worry I brought Star Wars we won't have to watch Christmas movies we've all seen a thousand time"

"Because we all know we haven't seen Star Wars anywhere near that many times," Thirteen joked. Smiling she put it into the DVD player, she loved the way Kutner without asking could tell when she was feeling bad. It was like he always knew what to do or say. Grabbing the popcorn and turning down the lights, she cuddled up against him.

_When we finally say good night,_

_How I'll hate going out in the storm;_

_But if you really hold me tight,_

_All the way home I'll be warm._

When the movie ended Kutner got up. Thirteen had fallen asleep. He watched her lying, she looked so peaceful. He wanted to stay there all night and watch her sleep. He wanted to stay with her forever, but he knew that wasn't going to happen anytime soon. It was a year since he told Thirteen that he loved her and she was still a mystery to him. He still didn't even know her name. She still hadn't even told him that she loved him, he could tell she did but she just couldn't tell him. She seemed like she wanted to keep distance between them because of the Huntington's, she didn't realize that he could deal with death. His parent's death made him realize that it didn't matter if you were going to die the next day, you should live everyday to its fullest and never be afraid to take risks. He just didn't know if he could get that through to Thirteen.

Just then his phone rang. He tried to pick it up quickly, so he didn't wake her up. It was the airline, they were telling him that his flight would be ready to leave in two hours and he needed to get to the airport immediately. He when over to Thirteen and gently nudged her, to wake her up. "Hey, I gotta go to the airport my fights leaving soon, I just wanted to say bye."

"Wait," She answered groggily, "Don't go yet I need to say goodbye." She got up and walked over to the door. As Kutner saw her walk over to him he realized how beautiful she was. She was groggy, her hair was a mess, and her makeup was smudged, but she was beautiful. Even in his head it sounded so cliché but it was true. She came over to him and wrapped her arms around his neck, and then she slowly and gently kissed him. He smiles, her lips are so soft and he is so gentle. He knows that deep down she is insecure. Like the time he was in the bathroom when she got out of the shower, she was so shy about her body, she immediately tried to cover herself up. They always had sex in the dark, you would never guess it form the way she presented herself to others but when you really got to know her you could see how insecure she really was. He loved that about her though.

"I left your present on the table." Kutner told her, gesturing over to the brightly wrapped gift sitting on her coffee table.

"Here is yours" She said quietly, as she passed him a present. He began to open the card when she said, "Not here, open it when you're on the plane." He smiled, kissed her and left, laughing at her childish insecurities.

_The fire is slowly dying,_

_And, my dear, we're still good-bye-ing,_

_But as long as you love me so._

_Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow._

As he sat on the plane Kutner opened his card. As he read the card he smiled. It said: "Dear Kutner, Merry Christmas! I've been meaning to tell you this for a while and I hope you don't think I'm chickening out not doing it face to face but I love you. -Remy" That was all he needed. He didn't care about what she got him, all hecared about where those words. It was so good to finally see them.


End file.
